Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Starting at 9pm yesterday, My best friend and i had a race for the first person to fuck in a toilet from that point onwards. This is my story of trying to win that race.

So it began at Alhambra on the dancefloor. There were hotties everywhere, i knew i would win the race, im confident in the fact that i can find sluts. First girl i see on the d-floor is looking at me cheekily so i grab her and tell her shes fucking hot. She starts dancing against me, im seeing all the signs so i pull her hair back and try to kiss her - "i have a boyfriend". "he doesnt have to know" she doesnt like this so i tell her to go away, im looking for sluts.

She took this as a challenge so kept grinding against me so i start grabbing her tits and rubbing her through her panties and say into her ear "lets go fuck in the toilets" she shakes her head so i again push her away and go to the bar. that was attempt 1 failed.

Let me digress for a moment. So im sure you all know im out in clubs a lot. There is one girl that i see every fucking time im out, my perfect girl. Tiny, small tits, long brown hair and bright red lipstick. my balls quiver every time i see her but ive been putting off trying to pick her up until i know im the man. Right now, i know im the man. I see her and go try pick her up, im hugging her, getting lots of signs but i dont try to kiss her. she says "i really have to go to the bathroom, but can i give you my number?" MY FUCKING DREAM GIRL and she asks to give ME her number. i of course get it and am so fucking happy. weeks of watching her beauty from afar have finally paid off. Anyway lets continue.

A girl walks past me "AWRITE LUV" she turns and looks weird at me "come on, give me a fucking smile i know you have a cute one in there somewhere" I dont get her name but within a minute im kissing her on the d-floor and because i wanted to win the race im escalating so fucking fast so i start grabbing her tits, rubbing her through her panties. she starts biting my lip and grabbing my dick. "i want to fuck you right now, lets go to the toilets". "im not that kind of girl" - so i tell her fine, i will go find a slut who wants to fuck me then and leave her. Attempt 2 Failed.

Girl 1 comes back and starts grabbing my dick after seeing me with girl 2 and i tell her if shes not prepared to fuck me in the toilets right now, dont bother. im not interested. she keeps grabbing my dick so i just play with her tits, i like tits. I then see another girl looking at me as shes walking past me as im grabbing this girls tits so i high five her and pull her in close. 

I tell her that shes fucking cute, but im not looking for cute im looking for sluts tonight. "I could out slut you anyday of the week" - Challenge accepted. i start kissing her, grabbing tits, wrapping her legs around me on the d-floor and i stop sucking face for a moment and see my perfect girl, the one ive wanted to weeks. just standing there looking at me in disgust. I stop kissing my girl and try to talk to Perfection, but she walks away. im heart broken. my ego just got in the way of a girl that i have lusted after for weeks and have been so nervous about talking too. now i had ruined it. "FUUUUUCK" i scream. then tell my friend what happened and he just laughs at me and says "poetic justice". 

I go back to the slut i was with, tell her that she has no chance of out slutting me "try me" she says. so i said "fine, lets go fuck in the toilet". "Lets". I grab her and off we go, i realise i dont have a condom so i just yell "SOMEONE GIVE ME A FUCKING CONDOM" a nice stranger gives me one and pats me and my girl on the back, straight into the toilets we go. we see the cleaner so go into a different cubicle, he says "comeon, i need to clean that can u use the other one". "sure, thanks man" i say back and anyway we're in the toilet and i start fingering her, she undoes my pants and starts giving me head.

BANG BANG BANG,  BANG BANG BANG "whoever is having sex in the toilet, stop now and come out, this is security"

wtf i think, and keep getting head. Then they fucking unlock the door while my dick is still out so i quickly put it back in my pants before the lady bouncer comes in and says we're being kicked out for fucking in the toilets.

Dex then messages me asking where i am, i say im being kicked out for fucking in the toilet so he meets me and my girl outside and we tell him the story. and then bid our farewells because we were going to find an ally to fuck in.

We go to the carpark across the road from GPO and its on again, she starts giving me head and i finger her more. I try to fuck her and i realise that me being 6'4" fucking sucks. i cant fuck her properly because im too tall. the angles are working against me, after a min or two of trying to find a good position my dick is getting soft so i pull the condom off and throw it away and tell her to give me more head.

this works and im back at attention only to realise that that was my only condom. FUCK, i tell her what i did and shes slightly mad but i tell her to jsut give me head and i will fuck her another time.

"I havent sucked a dick in a while, so i hope im not bad" - wtf, being this much of a slut i know shes done this before.

"How old are you?" - "oh i just turned 18 last week, this is the first time ive been to a club"

jesus fucking christ, first time at a club and she almost gets fucked in a toilet!

anyway, i tell her its a rule that i have to get a picture of her giving me head, and of her naked in the carpark. she doesnt mind this but i realise its the first night EVER that i didnt bring my camera. so i take a few pics with my shitty iphone camera. here is her naked - theres no face so it should be fine.

(due to not wanting to get my blog banned ill just share link: ) 

edit:Hmm so looking on her FB, her face isnt as good as her body. meh, shes a slut and thats all that matters. fuckable for sure.
Edit2: Here i changed it for an enhanced version

I then go down on her, well she was sitting on a hand rail but you know what i mean.

I then tell her im stealing her underwear for my sex bowl, "wtf is a sex bowl", "its a bowl of shit i steal from girls i fuck, you can either give me your underwear of your bra, your choice", "well its my fav bra, so keep the undies"

I guess its a lie of an item, because i couldnt fuck her due to being shit and positioning in public places.

We then finish up and go back to find our friends only to see Dex walking home, so we talk there and i tell him that she just gave me head in a carpark. and that we should have a threesome! I then pull her dress up to show Dex that i stole her undies and tell him to finger her. Dex plays with her vag ahahah. but none the less the threesome idea didnt work and i say bye the Dex. I get the girls number and she tells me we have to fuck soon, i tell her id like that.

She leaves, i get let back into Alhambra (weird right?) and the night ends.

Thats my story of getting so close, yet so far from winning the race with my friend in under 3 hours, All by being open with the girls telling them i would fuck them in the toilets, only took 3 attempts. but all in all, it was a good night. i got head in a carpark, i took naked pics of an 18yr old and a pic of her giving me head. and im sure as fuck i will fuck her soon - ive been messaging her today and its still on.

But, i will ALWAYS regret last night. my prefect girl and i quite possibly ruined it with her. I will still text her etc and see if i can fix it. i must have her, but i think if i do get her i will fall in love and it will ruin my days of being the man. I currently have 2 girlfriends, a girl that i will fuck (from last night), an 18 yr old i fucked last tuesday that likes me but i havent messaged since fucking her and 3 girls i constantly text / talk dirty too that im trying to fuck.

When getting into the pickup business i told myself i wanted 5 girlfriends and then i would stop. i never though it would be possible in only 4 months but i know its getting close and i know i can do it. but i would give them all away to just have that one girl. fuck.

This is how to text game a slut. The shadow way.


  1. Well with any luck, you can fix things with the perfect girl.

  2. Wow epic story, definitely kept my interest. Keep up the good work!


  4. Great pick up Game sir. I've been in the game myself for a little over a year now. Best change of my life :D

  5. yeee dawggg, get that poon.

    Loving your blog man, a very good read! come check out my music blog when you have a chance :)

  6. I have always wondered if anybodyactually had the cojones to genuinely undertake these sorts of challenge; takes guts to just hang it out there.

    You're on my list, bro.

  7. I like what you did with your blog.
    Followin !

  8. this post has it all!
    you sir are awarded one million internets!

  9. Kewl story, bra! waiting for updates from you

  10. i'm turned on. and its your fault

  11. Your a awesome dude!

    Why dont ya look at my blog?

  12. Hoollyy shit long post is looong...

    but very interesting I must say, Ill follow

  13. Just like I've always said, dirty girls will be dirty girls till the end of time. Extinct like a dinosaur.

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